Previews// Grand Theft Auto IV

Posted 28 Feb 2008 18:31 by
Companies:
Games: Grand Theft Auto IV
Before I take you to Rockstar’s Kings Road HQ in London for Grand Theft Auto IV on the Xbox 360 in a large dark room with the controller in my hand, you should know that I don’t particularly like the Grand Theft Auto series.

So, why the hell did I send me to get SPOnG’s first hands-on of the game that – Halo 3 and World of Warcraft expansion packs aside – is the biggest gaming release so far this century?

Simple reasons:

First up, there was a chance that the people who have seen it so far are the same kind of people who – because of their emotional investment - made themselves believe that Star Wars Episodes 1 to 3 weren’t heart-drilling chimeras.

{ The control in GTA IV is remarkably easy to get used to, even for a man more used to controlling PES players than targeting pistols while driving fast and talking on a mobile phone. }

I have no emotional investment in the GTA series.

Secondly, US-facing, car-driving, national stereotyping, gun-shooting, lowest common denominator, creatively deadended franchise extensions are guaranteed to draw my ire.

{ The way that the main character, Niko Bellic, is actually worth spending time with if only for his insouciant outlook on the turmoil that surrounds every step he takes or every corner he drags his car around, is amazingly immersive. }

Thirdly, ‘Missions’!? If I wanted to take orders, I would have joined the bloody army and not got a career that entails doing for a living what most other people consider a golden pastime to be treasured before the daily grind once again intercedes bringing them one step closer to a grateful death. Jesus, it’s not a difficult bloody concept. As far as I can see, all this ‘Mission’ nonsense is just another way to enforce conformity.

{ Like Burnout Paradise – which I love - the missions in GTA IV appear to be there for you to enjoy rather than simply to steer you in one direction, to the end of the game. Okay, I’m aware that, like the aforementioned BoP, if you don’t complete missions in GTA IV you won’t get true value from the game. Fine! For me, simply tooling about Liberty City, swapping cars and radio stations, looking at the lovingly (yes, it’s a cliché!) produced urbanity of this pseudo New York (and Brighton, Sussex) is a downright pleasure in an of itself. }

Fourthly, game graphics, I mean, all this HD… 1080p… 720b… 498b, graphical renderation on a cross-pixellated-base with tempura-ring marred by scrotcherized screen tear and bloody arghhghgh! Like the plot makes the movie, the energy makes the song, it’s the game-play that makes the game. I sent myself to see GTA IV because so much over so long has been said about Grand Theft Cocking Auto IV’s graphics that I was going to be see for myself.
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Companies:
Games: Grand Theft Auto IV

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Comments

jackdoe 29 Feb 2008 03:51
1/15
They didn't show you a PS3 build? IGN, Gametap, and Gamespy all had hands on with the PS3 version of the game.
TimSpong 29 Feb 2008 09:25
2/15
jackdoe wrote:
They didn't show you a PS3 build? IGN, Gametap, and Gamespy all had hands on with the PS3 version of the game.


I saw the game a number of weeks ago - when the PS3 version was not ready.

Cheers

Tim

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config 29 Feb 2008 16:28
3/15
Colour me "stoked" or "pumped" or whatever it them kids say when they're somewhat excited.

A real GTA followup is long overdue - those PSP wannabes were fun for a bit, but claw-like hands just cannee take lengthy play
king skins 12 Mar 2008 13:28
4/15
This, Left 4 Dead and Race Driver: Grid are the three games I'm most looking forward to this year.
Andyboy 21 Mar 2008 13:08
5/15
Quite possibly the most dull article I've ever had the misfortune to read. The author spent the entire coloumn writing about his own bloody preferences in games rather than giving an actual account of the game. We're interested in GTA not what the author likes/dislikes in his games!!! Compared to previews on rival sites, such as IGN and 1up, this is an embarrassment!
config 22 Mar 2008 15:04
6/15
Nonsense. All those bits in bold/braces are about the the game, the rest give the read context.
SPInGSPOnG 22 Mar 2008 15:19
7/15
Andyboy wrote:
Compared to previews on rival sites, such as IGN and 1up, this is an embarrassment!

Woo woo, look at me. I'm a mindless sheep, sucking on corporate site's cock, because I don't have the wit or intelligence to interpret anything that challenges my pitifully narrow conceptions of what a game preview should be.

There's a world out there you've never seen, suburb boy.
AndyBoy 25 Mar 2008 02:24
8/15
Woo woo, look at me. I'm an intellectually superpowered genius; from reading a few lines of a post I can instantly discern that I am superior to the poster. I therefore make statements like "There's a world out there you've never seen", which I obviously see due to my superior intellect. When I don't agree with the opinion of another poster I endeavour to determine exactly what derogatory sterotype the poster fits into, and from this.... completely disregard their entire argument. In any case, there is no such thing as opinion; just things people of less intelligence believe due to their... well, lack of intelligence.
- It is true there is a world out there I have never seen; being only mortal and not the superpower you are, I have only a finite amount of brainpower : ( But, as I am lucky enough to have randomly met thee in these forums; could you please, oh genius deity, enlighten me!
Ps. I would especially like to learn more phrases such as "sucking on a corporate site's c**k", because they show so much wit and intelligence!
TimSpong 25 Mar 2008 10:50
9/15
Andyboy wrote:
Quite possibly the most dull article I've ever had the misfortune to read.


I wrote it, so it's really only fair that I defend it. Dull? That's a shame.

My take is to at least try to get away from the theory that criticism is in any way objective and comes without context or history. It does, all of it, no matter where it comes from.

I was attempting not to hide the fact that I had opinions; that it was subjective criticism.

For example, I am bored to purgatory with graphics-geeking in reviews. It's only fair to let the reader know that, rather than pretending to some all-encompassing interest and knowledge... mostly by leaving things out.

However, knowing that some people don't like that, I structured it so that people could skip the me bits.

Andyboy wrote:
We're interested in GTA not what the author likes/dislikes in his games!!! Compared to previews on rival sites, such as IGN and 1up, this is an embarrassment!


Sure, I understand that you're (not sure about your use of the Royal "we" here) interested in the game itself - hence the structure of the review. Separating the 'context' from the 'fact' was a simple device, using which you could have skipped all the me bits.

You say that IGN and 1UP provide coverage. That's exactly the point isn't it? There are heaps of choice all over the Internet and even (gods forbid) print. But in that 'choice' there appears to be little additional perspective. Here at SPOnG I simply offer a different view.

Personally, I'm disappointed that you found my preview 'dull' and you apparently didn't get anything out of it. At least you took the time to commit that opinion to our forum though. So, thanks for that.

Cheers,

Tim
king skins 25 Mar 2008 13:55
10/15
well I quite liked it...
SPInGSPOnG 26 Mar 2008 08:50
11/15
AndyBoy wrote:
Woo woo, look at me. I'm an intellectually superpowered genius; from reading a few lines of a post I can instantly discern that I am superior to the poster.

I didn't need to read your post to "discern" that. Statistically it's a safe bet.

I therefore make statements like "There's a world out there you've never seen", which I obviously see due to my superior intellect.

I inferred it from the pedestrian attitudes to journalism you expressed in your posting that you are young, and inexperienced. Possibly quite poorly read too. I inferred that you are an American (so am I) who has never travelled outside your own tri-state area. But the reference to a world you have never seen was not one to the physical world, but rather to a world of ideas and concepts, of literary expression.

When I don't agree with the opinion of another poster I endeavour to determine exactly what derogatory sterotype the poster fits into, and from this.... completely disregard their entire argument.

But you didn't have an argument (look it up). You merely had an opinion, and one which you expressed poorly.

In any case, there is no such thing as opinion; just things people of less intelligence believe due to their... well, lack of intelligence.

Of course there is such a thing as opinion. And bad ones deserve mocking.

It is true there is a world out there I have never seen; being only mortal and not the superpower you are, I have only a finite amount of brainpower/

It only requires a finite amount of brainpower. You just have to open your eyes, and your mind. Instead of accepting the spoon fed crap of the popular press, you need to question it, challenge it.

As you already pointed out, corporate sites like 1up and IGN, which get all the early access to games because they swap review scores for coverage, have already told you about the game. This writer was trying to do something a little different. To give some creativity and individuality to what they wrote. But I guess creativity and individuality aren't what you look for in your writing. Just more fact and figures copied from the press releases. Probably better if you just go back to IGN, where you'll feel safe.

Ps. I would especially like to learn more phrases such as "sucking on a corporate site's c**k", because they show so much wit and intelligence!

Just trying to speak your language. But I guess I got it way wrong, when you can't even quote the word COCK without redacting it.
AndyBoy 26 Mar 2008 11:10
12/15
Wow....overally aggressive, misinterpretting my statements, still making ridiculously inaccurate assumpions about me; and the fact you actually wrote "statisically it's a safe bet" that you're superior to me (how can I possibly argue with that!). Take a word of advice my fellow american, hehe, next time you see a post like mine, respond like the other person who replied to my post:
"Nonsense. All those bits in bold/braces are about the the game, the rest give the read context.", instead of insulting the poster. After reading their reply, I realised that my computer did not initially display the bold text, due to a font problem (sorry mr author!). However, I thought I'd continue the discussion with you because it seemed like fun (yeh I know, I'm an arse!).
SPInGSPOnG 26 Mar 2008 11:27
13/15
AndyBoy wrote:
Wow....overally aggressive

Not actually aggressive at all. But, whatever.

misinterpretting my statements

Which ones, exactly?

still making ridiculously inaccurate assumpions about me

Which ones, exactly? I accept that given the time you are posting the chances of you being an American in America are reduced. But the love of mainstream sites like IGN still indicates that you are not looking for truth, credibility or individuality in your games journalism.

Take a word of advice

OK! But your advice is that I should write the same as someone else has already written. And that was the same advice you had for the writer of the GTA IV article. So my assumption that you don't want to read anything new or different, or anything that challenges your view of how things should be seems to hold true.

However, I thought I'd continue the discussion with you because it seemed like fun (yeh I know, I'm an arse!).

Hey, at least you are open to discussion. And it is meant to be fun. You seem like less of an arse to me now.

AndyBoy 27 Mar 2008 15:03
14/15
hehe..we'll leave it there then. I think "less of an arse" is about the best I can possibly hope for after me making such a dumb ass comment to start with.
vault 13 29 Mar 2008 20:49
15/15
Colin Powell wrote:
I thought your comments were trite and pedantic.

Thank you!

Kurt Cobain wrote:
What does trite and pedantic mean?

That's what I'm saying!

"Hollywood" Hulk Hogan wrote:
Whatcha gonna do when all the little Hulkamaniacs come for you!?.

I think I'm going to cry.

Abraham Lincoln wrote:
Does anyone else find this sidebar to be a complete waste of time?

YES!

On a serious note, I didn't like the article, but found no reason to make comment to criticize it. I found alot of the personal comment hard to decipher but whatever.
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